-Do you ever get scared to sleep in a room in the dark when the closet door is opened?
-Okay, so I've been hallucinating lately, spending days in bed making plans, plans for things that can never come true! The scary thing is that these plans have previously come physically true… not once, not twice… it's all about giving in.
-I need to break free… I'm suffocating… I'm scared
I hate limitations; I hate that I like wedding rings yet I have to pretend otherwise, I hate that I want a big wedding but can't say it out loud, I rather have no wedding than have the shit planned…everything has to be fuckin affordable, but who are you fuckin kiddin !! and to be honest, I DON’T EVEN WANNA GET MARRIED IN THE FIRST FUCKIN PLACE, I'm not cut out for this !!!!!!
I don't wanna serve, or be responsible for the partner or any creatures that may result from fucking him, which I believe will also suck as much as the rest of the relationship
I wanna have a beautiful home, I hate my potential apartment, my dad's beach house is 3X bigger… I wanna buy beautiful things for the place I will stay in, I can't be hearing shit about having things made to save money… 55555555 a7a…
I hate having someone watching my every step, someone interfering in everything along the way even K.Om el ma3la2a eli 7akol beeha !
And yeah I'm crying, cause I wanna be with someone who will make me happy, who will take me to nice places, buys me nice stuff and pays for dinner.
I hate that I feel nothing, I don't feel in love anymore… I hate that I'm looking for the feeling in mini-situations… I hate that I keep fantasizing about love stories that I am no longer able to have
--And what's with the people getting married and logging to facebook and uploading pics the very next day? Shouldn't you people be fucking or fornicating or something?
--And yeah, he better think you're not putting out cause you're shy, and not cause you're a Homo…
--I wish I was a lesbian… much much much much easier regardless of the fact that girls suck as well if not more.
--PS: I hate teddies, I HATE TEDDIES…. Who loves teddies asasan ! okay they're cute for once, twice… 5elesna !
--I'd rather be alone than sorry…
I hate that my plan is get married and get divorced, cause I can't see it any other way…
Thank you… really.
14 comments:
A7A
First of all You have to choose the things that make you happy & fuck off any thing else
Second Try To Visit Therapist or something to know another opinions , may be you afraid to be commitment with someone else , I'm that btw :D :S !!
Ahmad
???
(btw I respect people writing their name AhmAd with an A not an E before the D)
safa7_Karmooz
I'm trying to do that
but I'm not getting married to learn to be alone and have fun by myself :D
and yeah i'm scared of commitment, I'm freaked out actually and i'm taking defensive extreme intense shitty actions
yalla mesh mohem, shwia w 7ab2a 7elwa :D
sba7 el khier b2ali kater mosh bkr2a 3andek haaga .
اسف هاحول اكتب ابلعربي عشان اوضح وجه نظري لاني حاسس بوجه نظرك جدااا
بصي يافندم الارتباط بشخص هو تقيد للحريه لانك بتتقيد بشخص اخر فبتالي كل شيء بيتغير اولهم اولوياتك لو زمان كانتي بتعملي شوبينج مرتن اوز حاجه هتتغير دلوقتي لانك بقيتي مسئوله من شخص اخر وحسب ظروفه والعقل بيقول ايه الاقرف ده طيب مانا عايشه لوحدي ومحدش بيقرفني ليه اجيب القرف لنفسي كل ده عشان الجواز وكمان مش جواز حاجه فيه بتهيالي تمن كبير قوي للحريه وراحه البال , بس كل ده عشان احنا مش شخص خطاء لما هتكوني مع الشخص الصح انتي مش هضحي بشيء لانكك ببسطه انتي نفسك هتتغيري عشان تكوني مع الشخص ده ولو بتعملي شوبينج مرتين هتعمليها كذا مره مع شريك العمر لانك حبه ده من الاخر مش هتبصي علي العوقات هتبصي علي الايجابيات سيدتي بس كدده بتمني لحضراتك السعاده يارب لان كلنا بندور عليه سعات كتير بتكون قبل الحب نفسه
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CRFRN0srvXw
asdk di ?! :D
Safa7_Karmooz
YES... heya di :D
I love the video
I love the donkeys. the dancing, everything :D
Mahmoud Hermes
ana moktane3a b weg'het nazarak m3 eni mo5talefa f 7aga... eni 7'alas I no longer believe in love w being happy with someone you love.... b2a kolo "3adi"
Plain "3adi"
انا مؤمن ان في حب لان الحب مش حرام ومش بايد الانسان لان مكنها القلب والقلب صعب تلمسه بايدك لاكن ممكن تلمسه بمشاعرك لاكن عشان احنا بنحب الحب نفسه فبنكون خايفين لايكون مش صح او مش هو الحقيقي او .... او.... حجات كتير عشان كده بتكون العلاقات مشدودوه وكمان عشان احنا بنكون في دمغنا شخص معين رسمينه في حيتنا نفسنا نعيش معها وبنفجاء في الحقيقه بش تاني بنحبه بس بنحاول نحط فيها الصوره الي ف دماغي فبتالي بتبتقي صعبه تطبيقها :( فنبفتكر انه مفيش حب بدليل انك ممكن تلاقي الحب مقطع بعضه قبل الجواز بعد الجواز ممكن تعمليه صنيه بطاطس بلحمه افيد :) هههههههههههه روقي ان شاء الله ربنا يكتبلك الي فيه الخير دائما تحياتي يافندم
safa7_karmooz
anta gamed awi :D ana bhbha awi :D
أولاً و مبدئياً 10000 مبروك يا لوزه .. ربنا يتمم بخير و (يهدّى سرك)بلدى قوى يا حسين بس مناسبه للحاله اللى عبرتى عنها فى البوست
ثانياً البوست عظيم .. أنا لو خطيبك و قريته هحاول ادور معاكى على حل وسط لكل مشاكلك الميتافيزقيه دى أنا فعلاً حبيت صراحتك فى البوست :)
لو مش باقيه على الجوازه قوى ممكن تبعتيه لخطيبك بجد p:
ثالثاً: نتكلم بجد بقى .. فى الحياه كلها مش الجواز بس لازم تعملى تضحيات حسب اولوياتك و أحتياجاتك اه هتضحى بحريتك شويه لكن هتكسبى حد تشاركيه حياتك و مشاكلك و نجاحاتك و احلامك تحبيه ويحبك أكيد فى خساره بس فى المقابل فى مكسب و الموضوع فى الأول وفى الأخر تقيمه فى ايدك تقدرى تضحى بأيه فى مقابل ايه
ويحضرنى كلام عمك صلاح جاهين هنا
جالك أوان ووقفت موقف وجـــود
يا تجود بده يا قلبي يا بده تجـود ما حد يقدر يبقي علي كل شـئ
مع إن – عجبي – كل شئ موجود و عجبي
إستمتعت بالبوست فعلاً وأتمنالك السعاده و التوفيق :)
Mahmoud Hermes
I TOTALLY agree with you
of course I feel love, but I miss the sparks .... 3aref ama btet3araf 3la 7ad w te7es en fi 7aga momken te7sal...w yeb2a fi ummm kahraba keda :D I miss this state...
now ay 7aga bete7sal heya heya, nafs el e7sas law mawgood asasan
yalla b2a :D keberna w 7'alas
ihapoof
looooool @ yehaddy serrek :D
thank you dear... haven't seen you in ALOT
he's a blogger... bas m3takedsh eno 2arah.. kont 7a3raf :D
I want him to read it, 3arfa eny alelet el adab w safla felli ba2olo bas I want him to know exactly what I felt, when i felt it
mana 7ada77y !!! bas 3ayza ama ada7y a7es eni bada7y 3shan 7aga testahel w te3eesh el 3omr kolo :D mesh shahren w a7es eni 3aiza awala3 f nafsy
Thank you again dear :))))
If you want my opinion:
Get Out NOW.
I have been there; and not that I hated being engaged to that x, I just hated the "me" I am with him. I know that all the people posting comments here are trying to rationalize. But seriously, the fact that it is not a mood but rather an overwhelming feeling that made you write that much and that strong.
You won't regret anything begad. Getting married to the right person really really liberates you from your fears not makes you confront them. Okay, maybe some fears. But at least at the very very least, you should be envisioning your life with that person not dreading it. Even if it all fell apart later because of things that came up; but the start has to be satisfying , not "magical".. but satisfying for what you want and who you want to be.
P.S: I hate teddy bears too :) :)
"mana 7ada77y !!! bas 3ayza ama ada7y a7es eni bada7y 3shan 7aga testahel w te3eesh el 3omr kolo"
بتتكلمى على سخان جداً
"سخان أبوللو .. سخان العمر كله" !!
try to love him not to use him :)
By the way , what is ur name? i think that i know u indirectly (through common friends)
enjoy :)
gjoe
the problem now is, I can't imagine myself with someone else
not cause I love him, no
cause I know he's right, he's the lesser of 2 evils :D
I'm recalculating, I'm rethinking, but it ALWAYS ends up with the same result.
I'm trying to re-shape him, to adjust him... just wish me the best
the thing that I can't deny... he's so kind and pure... I mean he does these things unintentionally, he can't deal with girls...
ihapoof
eh da!!! ana kont sha3'ala fil e3lan dah :D
Obbaaa, I love him and am using him :D
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