I am so happy, Being engaged, being out with my fiancé… he's a great man, extremely classy, nice, sweet, caring and rich ! and I believe I love him…
Oh… how I love being with him in his car, watching him drive while talking "business" on his mobile phone… I'm the business man's wife to be!
I love the drive in his extremely luxurious car… ummm how great my life is about to be…
I am so excited to start my new life as a woman of the high society…
Wearing branded clothes, high heels and classy skirt, talking from the tip of my nose and to the highest ranked people in town…
Being in the high society events, cocktail parties, charity galas, maybe someday I'll be the spokes person in one…
I love how he showers me with gifts and how he plans to surprise me with anything I want… sometimes even before I think I want it…
It all started off like a fairy tale… with the prince on one knee proposing with a ring that has a rock that can reflect the sun accompanied by promises of endless love and happiness…
Oh, I love my fiancé…
Oh wait, my phone is ringing… it's my mother in law… "hello ma…" this woman really charms me… how elegantly she behaves, how precious she always appears with her real diamonds and pearls necklace and the tens of karats of gold that are different every time I see her according to what she's wearing…
This is THE new life I'm gonna be in for the rest of my life… Maaaaaan, I'm gonna enjoy this…
Ummm… but why do I remember "him"… Okay he's the only man I have truly had true feelings for… why do I keep remembering how he felt for me that was all real and not just sugar coated, and the warmth that lacked the appearances… well, the fake appearances…
We used to be happy no matter where we go regardless of how broke we used to be, I miss the look in his eyes and the touch of his skin… I remember… damn… all of him…
Maybe cause he used to make me feel alive? Maybe cause I used to shiver every time he touched me?... I am extremely happy and I love my fiancé but when he touches me it feels more like he's "punching" a lifeless sandbag…
I gotta be reasonable thou… cause now… here… I will have whatever I want whenever I want it! I will look better than everyone I used to know and I will have even more than I need and I will actually be able to brag about it…
It suddenly hit me… I am enjoying this… enjoying the gifts and being the centre of attention But this is not my place to be… this is not who I am…
I should run…
If only "he" would take me back…
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In some point in life it's either choosing to suffer or suffer… suffering not getting what you want or getting what you want and suffering the consequences…
Sometimes people compromise something important for something that isn't that important… based on the momentarily decision…
I guess values differ from one person to another.













